World Health and Safety at Work Day is on April 28th. I’ve been meaning to cover the topic of health and safety in the workplace for quite some time.
Some of you may not know this but I used to work as a health and safety officer. I’m trained up to a NEBOSH level and, honestly, I really enjoyed it. But ultimately the pressures of the job weren’t for me and sadly I left that position while undergoing intense eating disorder treatment in 2019. Despite how difficult this decision was for me to make, it was the best course of action for me at the time and I’ve no regrets about it.
*Do I get the itch to inform people of every little thing they’re doing wrong with knives at work? All the damn time! Is it my circus to run? No, so I stay out of it and walk home with the knowledge that it’s not my place to try and bubble wrap everyone. [*It should be noted that I too do things wrong in regard to health and safety. It’s culture and if you’re within a culture where no one cares, then even the most knowledgable of us start to not give a damn. Even about our own safety.]
Although this year’s theme is in regard to harassment in the workplace, I wanted to cover the topic of stress and burn out. Gabi very kindly offered to discuss her experience with managing stress while in recovery from an eating disorder in what can only be described as a highly-stressful environment.
I recently spoke at an event for eating disorder awareness. They kept referring to me as a “survivor.” It was on the poster, it’s how they introduced me, so clearly it’s how they saw me, right? But this bothered me! I know how that sounds, after all, being bothered that someone called me a survivor is a little lame. But allow me to explain. It bothered me because I am not a survivor. I’m no longer at my worst and manage my day to day life and responsibilities, but I’m not cured from the eating disorder. I haven’t survived this disorder, I’ve just learned to manage it. And so being called a survivor felt wrong to me.
I’ve had an eating disorder since I was sixteen, and it’s sent my life down a completely different path. While my friends were finishing up high school I was in treatment. When they went off to the next big steps in their lives, I was building a life that could only revolve around my treatment. I was on a different track and no one understood it, but I was doing what I needed to be done for myself.
Just as I was getting to a stable place, I landed a part-time job as an assistant. I figured it would be the perfect stepping stone to help me figure out what came next. I’d just gotten my degree as a pastry chef, but I was on the fence about whether it was a field I wanted to work in. But this job was what I needed! At first, I figured I’d only be there for a few months before moving on. But life doesn’t always go the way we plan, and it somehow turned into a full-time position.
No one I worked with knew that I’d a history with an eating disorder. They might have suspected, but no one actually knew. I was in a workplace where I got to reinvent myself completely. No one was worried about my mental health, they were just worried about whether I was good at my job. And, truth be told, it was so refreshing. I was finally able to separate myself from my eating disorder, even if it was just a little bit.
As time went on I rose in the ranks and my job became more demanding. I was production managing full films and there was no room for error. I was proving to myself and to everyone around me that I was just as good as anyone else. My eating disorder wasn’t holding me back this time. I was able to balance work and life.
Then I was producing a video series and I finally decided to share my story. All of a sudden the people I’d been working with for three years found out this big secret I tried so desperately to hide. I think one of my biggest fears about going public with my story was that people would start seeing me as weak. I’d worked so hard to build myself as a professional and I started wondering if I was going to ruin that all.
No one treated me like I was weak, no one started watching what I ate; No one cared. I mean they cared, they cared a lot. But they didn’t worry about it affecting me or my work. It was a crazy realization for me!
My job’s intense and very full-on. I work way more hours than I should, I give my all to everything I do at work, and it can be exhausting. But it’s also exhilarating. When I was deep in my eating disorder I never would have thought that I could hold a job like this, it seemed totally impossible. But all of those negative thoughts I had about myself then are what fuel me now.
Like I said before I’m not a survivor, I still struggle. Some days are really good but some days are also really hard. Instead of making me feel stressed and overworked when I’m having hard days my career does the opposite for me. It makes me feel empowered. I built a career from scratch in a field that I didn’t study for and had no skills in. I found something that made me happy and fulfilled and I gave it my all.
I remind myself of what I did to get here. All the skills I learned in recovery have helped me get here. Fighting my anorexia made me strong and resilient and those are things that help me today. It doesn’t matter that I have an eating disorder, I’m killing it in my field, against all the odds.
I’ve a great relationship with both of my bosses, and it makes a huge difference. They’re understanding when I need some flexibility, and they make sure that I am never pushing myself too hard. Don’t let yourself get stuck in an environment where you are being encouraged to push yourself past your limits.
If you’re not fueled properly you won’t be able to keep up and give your best. When I shared about my ED I was really worried that everyone at work would start judging what I ate every day, and for a while that was bad. But then I realized by not eating what I wanted/needed to at work, I was the one suffering.
This is a must! Even on my most intense days, I make sure that I have at least one hour for self-care. Whether that is hanging out with my husband, watching TV or just taking a shower, it’s important to do something you enjoy outside the workplace. Make sure you don’t lose yourself.
It’s your choice if you want to share your personal life with your coworkers. You don’t owe it to anyone to tell them, but if you want to share it I encourage you too.
Whether it’s a therapist, a relative or a friend, have someone who you can talk to when the stress is a bit too much. We all need someone to ground us and who we can vent to, and that’s really important in a high-intensity setting.
Remember that you’re here because you can do the job. No one handed you this job on a silver platter. You fought for it and you deserve it. This is you. And you should be SO proud of yourself.
I’m so passionate about my workplace and I give it my all. But I also find things that I am passionate about to focus on in my free time. I like art, and so I make sure that I always have something around that I can create with. My house is a mess of knitting yarn, drawing pencils and paints, and other arts and crafts odds and ends.
No one can survive without some social time. Some of my good friends are my coworkers, but it’s still crucial for me to socialize outside of work. Try to find one night a week for being social, even if that means having a friend over and staying in pajamas. Just make sure you don’t let the long hours send you into isolation.
It’s okay to need a mental health day sometimes. You can’t always give 100%. And, most importantly, it’s okay to not be okay. Sometimes we all just need to be able to take a breather, and you should make sure that your workplace encourages that. No one can give everything all the time without burning out. Hit the pause button every now and then even just for an hour or two.
At the end of the day it comes down to this; you and your wellbeing are top priority over any workplace. For me, that means being kick-ass in my career and putting a lot of focus there. It’s okay if that doesn’t hold true for you. What is key is that you’re doing what you need to do to live your happiest and best life. And for me, that means that I keep growing and learning. The feeling of knowing that I am good at my job and successful reminds me every day why I need to keep fighting. When I stop fighting I will have to stop everything I have worked so hard to build. And so while I might relapse and struggle I have a goal to keep moving towards. And I hope you do too.
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Congratulations on all your achievements! I guess it is always best for us to play on our strengths than focus on our weaknesses. Though both is a part of who we are. O do agree with having a great boss. However, they are so rare to find. I’ve always wanted a mentor but rarely ever get one. A good boss is one of my motivational factors. The opposite drains my energies.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting on Gabi's post! x
Congratulations on all your achievements! I guess it is always best for us to play on our strengths than focus on our weaknesses. Though both is a part of who we are. I do agree with having a great boss. However, they are so rare to find. I’ve always wanted a mentor but rarely ever get one. A good boss is one of my motivational factors. The opposite drains my energies.
Stress is definitely a silent killer for many people. There are excellent tools in this article to help.
Thank you for reading and commenting. x
I didn't know you used to be a health and safety advisor! Great post - I can imagine keeping up your work routine as well as recovery is SO hard. I think keeping up with work and any mental illness is difficult and worth acknowledging xxx
Yeah, I used to work in health and safety within an Abattoir. It's a passion of mine (the health and safety, not the abattoir) but I don't know if I'll ever be mentally fit to go back to that high-stress environment. That being said, I have considered it.
Thank you so much for reading. I really want to start bringing more of my health and safety training into my blog posts because there is so much of it which is wellness related. xx
Huge congratulations on all your achievements - I used to be an ISO Quality Manager and it nearly killed me! All the processes, procedures, box ticking, I can't imagine how overwhelming H&S must be, even without an eating disorder to deal with. It's very brave of you to share your story and especially the positives you've taken from it. Thank you xxx
Congratulations on all your success I guess workplace can be managed at some point I don't think that staying at home stress can be managed anyway
It was very overwhelming for me! I know Quality is also very, very difficult.
Thank you so much for reading Gabi's story! x
Great tips. Best way for better performance
Thank you so much for stopping in and reading. x
Being able to recognize when you need a break is so important, no matter what your job. I'm "just a stay at home mom" (in quotes because it's hard AF lol), but I often find myself needing a massive break from the kiddos. Especially during all this lockdown craziness. Thanks for these tips!
I couldn't imagine being a mother. I mean I want to be one someday, but I often picture myself just losing it. Honestly, 'stay at home mums' don't get enough credit for what they do! xx
I work from home, so I make sure to take breaks so I don't get stressed. I also need to remind my kids when I need to work. It can be tricky since I'm used to them being at school, but we're managing!
Thank you so much for stopping in and reading. I really appreciate it. x
This is great advise for everyone actually. I can imagine workplace stress and recovery don't go too well together in many instances.
Thank you for reading :D
Thank you for sharing this, it's such great advice. I was working in a busy retail job right when my OCD was at its worst and at the beginning of my recovery. While my friends were really supportive, often there were a number of 'senior' staff members who would tell me to 'get on with it' and 'I know you're having a bad day, but it's really busy downstairs so...' There are times when I regret telling them about it, but in hindsight I think it was definitely the right thing to do, and while they were rubbish with some aspects, they were quite good in another. The main one being that because the NHS CBT service only worked when I did, they were fine with me coming into work 2 hours later - it was unpaid, but I'd rather that than they created a massive stink over it! xx
Thank you for commenting and telling me your story.
I recently returned to the workplace (current on leave again because of COVID-19) but only one of my colleagues and the store manager are aware of my condition. Although I'm very open here, I'm not as open in real life and I often try to push myself to match everyone else's drum beat. Sadly it never ends well. But if COVID has taught me anything it's that my health comes first, embarrassment or not. xx
Thanks for sharing this useful resource. Stress in the workplace is something I can’t avoid, and need to handle better.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting. x